girl at large

Searching

House hunting in winter sucks. Our budget means a fixer upper, which we love, but come on! It has to be at least mostly structurally sound. Milwaukee has some ugly, ugly housing stock right now.

According to the listings, the highlight of the Wisconsin home apparently is the basement bar.

I am determined not to buy a house by the pound-- bigger is not always better, especially when it comes to Midwestern heating bills and renovations. I'd rather have a little gem that I can afford to fix up now with the best materials rather than in ten years and too cheaply. I miss the days of being able to vacuum my whole apartment without ever changing outlets. I don't want to own and maintain rooms we never use.

But every house we have seen, regardless of size, has been a trashed mess. Do people really live like this? Is this really all you get for your money?

My dreams of something "cool" with "potential" are fading. At this point, I'd settle for "not gross".

Take the Second Exit for Santa's Workshop

Baby Vivienne can't appreciate it yet, but her mom loves the crap out of Christmas. I can't wait until she understands leaving her shoes out for St. Nick, leaving cookies for Santa Claus and leaving mom and dad asleep on Christmas morning.

I love cookies, Yule logs, putting another log on the fire, singing carols and Carole King, wrapping presents, picking just the perfect present and judging someones esteem of me by their present.

Yes, I said it.

It's not pretty, it's not Christian (which I also am not), but it's true. When your significant other gives you a laminated wall map, and only a laminate wall map, the thought will float in your mind as your heart sinks in your belly that perhaps your beloved thinks less of you, thinks that you were not nice this year, thinks you are ....a delivery driver.

Not Guilty

I returned to work, only part-time for the month of December, yesterday.

Everyone, and by everyone I mean everyone, including my dental hygienist, has asked "How are you?", "Are you ok?", "How are you handling it?". Imagine the accompanying head tilt and sympathetic expression.

I have not entered my child into a gulag. I have delivered her to a facility that is designed and dedicated to the care of children, with the backing of the state, county, city and the respected YMCA organization. It is regulated, licensed and inspected. There are FOUR ladies committed to her care in a lovely, toy and baby equipment-filled room with only a few other infants. They each have degrees in child development, training in infant CPR, certificates galore and ongoing education requirements.

I have a GED and a functioning uterus. I should have dropped the kid off weeks ago!