I have insurance, and if I can be converted into LOVING my chiropractor, than how bad could therapy be?
We've been having Work Therapy at work. And it's, well, working. I LOVE our work therapist. I figure if it's helping that much at work, maybe I should consider some personal therapy. This is a more difficult decision to come to than you might think. For me, going to Therapy is not, as it seems to be for many, like popping into the corner Starbucks. My Latte does not come with a pump of Prozac.
You see, at one dark time in my life (ok, two dark times), I really NEEDED therapy. Serious therapy, and meds. Serious meds. It was a frightening, lonely experience. Being hospitalized for Crazy at a young age, unless you get a book contract, is not a point of pride. I've worked diligently to get the Crazy behind me, and continue working hard to keep it's tentacles at a safe distance.
So, admitting that I might need HELP to accomplish a few personal things is tough. In my mind, it's like admitting I need help to poop. It's just not done. Therapy is for serious Crazy, not Just-Kinda-Struggling-A-Little.
But, I'm coming around. Maybe a weekly chat with someone will help me focus on the things I want to change and/or improve. Maybe asking for HELP will not result in a long-term stay at Hotel Crazy.
Here are my complaints:
-The lack of sunshine and warm weather in Portland makes me suidical. (Ok, not literally, and I know I should rephrase this when speaking to a doctor.)
-I feel I'm entering my Angry Years. Everything, and everyone, pisses me off. And I get no satisfaction from my anger--I'm furious, everyone else sees "Silly Kate". Did you not just hear me say Fuck Off? Right, I never actually say that, I just very politely stew. Ok--I want to LEARN to say Fuck Off.
-My libido has died. I can't determine if my libido has died because I'm not getting any or if I'm not getting any because my libido has died. Memorial Services pending.
-I have problems with money. I don't have money problems, I have a problem with money.
-I want to make big changes in my life, and I wonder if I can or should. The issues above are all in the way of the changes I want to make--namely, I want a family. No libido, problems with money--kinda key issues if you want to make babies.
So, there it is. I have Therapy Orientation this afternoon, wish me luck! Maybe I'll learn to LOVE my therapist too.